Dad is about the same. He's been confused quite a bit this week. He's lost more weight. He's lost about 17 lbs since Dec, and about 40 lbs all together. It sure is hard seeing him the way he is. I don't know if it's pregnancy hormones, or that I've just started to "grieve over the daddy I have lost". Yes, he is still with us, Praise the lord, but he is not the same Daddy that I have known for the past 29 years of my life. I can't help but shed a few tears after almost every visit with him. I guess my you could say I'm finally "mentally" accepting all this. I'm realizing my daddy won't be there for the birth of my 2nd child like he was my first. He's not there for me to call up and ask for his advice. I no longer receive those phone calls asking how in the heck he does certain things on the computer or anything else technology related. =) I miss having to remind him he has a cell phone for a reason, and there is no reason to have one if you keep it turned off when you are out and about. There is no better way to put it, other than This sucks. None of this makes sense to any of us right now.... Hopefully one day it will. Something a dear family friend said to me back in August has stuck with me ever since. He said God is good all the time, but that doesn't mean there isn't suffering in this world. And amen! That is the truth. I remind myself of this almost daily. Thanks, Mr Don. I was given the Jesus Calling app by another one sweet family friend. I love this app! It's a daily devotional and I feel like so many of these are just for us! I'll send Mom some from time to time and they always seem so fitting for how we are feeling. This is one of my favorites.....
Keep your eyes on Me! Waves of adversity are washing over you, and you feel tempted to give up. As your circumstances consume more and more of your attention, you are losing sight of Me. Yet I am with you always, holding you by your right hand. I am fully aware of your situation, and I will not allow you to be tempted beyond what you are able to bear.
Your gravest danger is worrying about tomorrow. If you try to carry tomorrow’s burdens today, you will stagger under the load and eventually fall flat. You must discipline yourself to live within the boundaries of today. It is in the present moment that I walk close to you, helping you carry your burdens. Keep your focus on My Presence in the present.
Gosh.... I tear up every time I read this. Friends, please take a moment and let your loved ones know how much you care for them. You never know what tomorrow may bring.
Before I sign off ( I have been interrupted 4 times while writing this post by a certain 2 1/2 year old), I want to share a few pictures. Gracie and I had Pop duty last wkend since Mom was in Oxford. Gracie and Pop did some coloring and she decided she wanted to hold his hand while she colored.
If that doesn't melt your heart, I don't know what will!!!!!
Dad sent Caroline a picture Sat morning letting her know he was thinking of her and cheering her on back in Heber. I hope each and every one of you has a wonderful weekend. We are 3 weeks away from welcoming Baby Carley, so lots of "relaxing" is in order for us this weekend. (Is relaxation even possible with a 2 1/2 year old?!?!?!)
Since Dad became ill, I've learned of many stories from his Lake Village and
Hendrix days. Some I had heard bits and pieces of before and others I had never
heard of. Some of these stories I wish I would have known of while I was
younger, so I could have reminded him of them when I was in trouble (which of
course hardly EVER happened!). Anyway..... Dad received a card in the mail
yesterday. I'm not sure if the author of this card reads the blog or not, but if
you do, please know we all got a good laugh.... Especially Dad! It involved some
boys and the Mississippi River/Greenville bridge back during Dad's Lake Village
days. It does us so good to see Dad happy and reminiscing like he did today
after reading the card. He had the biggest smile on his face! =) He also
reminded me not to believe everything I'm told.... Especially stories from
Wilson Bynam! Ha! Although his stories are the best!!!!!
I'm attaching a
video of Dad getting down with his air guitar. Mr Bill Johnston brought him some
CDs on Friday and he has really enjoyed them! One of the therapists said he
passed his room and saw him "strumming his guitar" and had to stop and join him
for a second! Lol
Caroline graduates from Ole Miss this weekend. This is such a happy time as well
as sad for our family. We never would have dreamed Dad wouldn't be there to see
her walk across that stage. If you know Dad, you know his love for Oxford and
Ole Miss. I am staying behind as well to check in on dad and traveling long
distances is no fun when you are 8 months preggo. My Aunt Terri is going with
Mom and they are heading out Friday morning.
I'll end with a picture of the
little girl that keeps our world turning. I honestly don't know that any of us
could have made it through this without her. She is a light for all of us and
definitely keeps us going.
Josh and I dated during college, married on April 21, 2007. and welcomed our first child, Gracie Kate, on October 14, 2009. This little girl has stolen our hearts and we are just soo in love with her. Life is good right now and we just can't wait to see what the future holds for us!